My sweet 11 year old niece moved across the world to Seoul, South Korea this year. A two year adventure of epic proportions for her and her family. A lifelong Midwest city girl from a vibrant and quaint neighborhood is now the resident of a major global metropolis on a desirable peninsula in East Asia. The first 2 weeks in her new home were quarantine restricted to her 12th floor apartment, with sweeping skyline views of a modern city rooted in culturally rich traditions. She had a birds eye view and took it all in, with curiosity and wonder. She waited patiently and when it was safe and sound, she opened the door and bravely entered her new life.

She’s learning a new language, developing special friendships and attending an international school. She’s playing in the snowy mountains outside of the city, relaxing on the warm seaside coastal beaches and exploring all the nooks and crannies in between. Her brand new place in the world. As she settled in this fall, she created something beautiful in her art class titled “Lost in this World”*. It hit me to my core when I saw it. A girl lost in this world. It spoke to me, felt raw and real…who hasn’t been lost in this world in some way, shape or form? We even get lost in our comfortable and predictable surroundings, lost in our heads, lost in our roles, lost in our distractions, lost in our relationships. It’s natural to get lost, part of our human history and condition. It’s how we learn to adapt and build resilience. It’s where discovery and growth happen. Many of you reading this have no doubt been lost in the world with me. Getting lost is confusing and scary, it’s disorienting not knowing all the answers and outcomes. Shocking to the system. We can feel alone, misunderstood and anxious. In the dark. Be careful and take your time.

I’m always amazed by the stories of explorers, adventurers and regular people who have lost their way, face the most extreme conditions, either by choice or circumstance, and come out triumphant with a new sense of purpose. Some start out with an accurate map, detailed plan and preparation to help on their expedition, but they get off course and face uncharted waters, unexpected storms and unfamiliar territory. They’ve never been here before. Pushed to the edge and to their limit, they are battered, bruised and broken. They have a choice. Where will they put their attention? They breathe and slow down for a moment. They surrender to the truth of what is right in front of them, the present moment. One moment in time. That’s where they find themselves.

Here and now. It’s a quiet, still place where we gather our innate and learned skills and put them to the test. We ask good questions and listen deeply. Our preparation meets the moment of opportunity and we take action. We meet obstacles and challenges that feel insurmountable and we may doubt everything we’ve ever known and trusted. We fail and make mistakes, pick ourselves up and keep going. We pay close attention and trust that we are right where we are supposed to be. We practice being brave. We do our best and remember that we are never really alone in this world. There are always friends and helpers along the way, if we look for them. Sometimes they aren’t people. Sometimes they are an animal, flower, rock, dream, bird, song, idea, tree, river, the moon. Reminders that we are all connected.

Getting lost can be fun and magical too! When we accept where we are, things begin to make sense and come into focus. The path becomes clear again and the world opens up in fresh ways. We see all the beauty and embrace the mystery. We continue to walk in the direction of our dreams. We always have the power to change our mind and go a different way. We discover that we are capable of making and navigating our own unique map. Everything we need is right inside of us and we are guided by a force bigger than ourselves. We are ready to spread our wings and fly now.

You are a bright light, dear Louisa and ALL my other loves out in the world, and don’t ever forget that! HOME is not just a place somewhere out there, it’s truly where the HEART is. HOME = HEART. Where is your heart right now? Feel it. It is fragile, so don’t forget to take good care of it. Remember to listen to it and always follow it. That takes courage and confidence. Keep being yourself and jump in with your whole heart!

Life is your laboratory and studio, and you are the scientist and artist. Keep experimenting and creating. You inspire me! Practice smiling on the inside every day, even on the hard days, and know that you are gaining new superpowers that will help you when you get lost again. Annyeong, 2021! Welcome in, 2022!

Lost & Found,

Auntie Gretchen

* Music and art do wonders for the lost soul. “Lost in the World”, a song introduced to me in quarantine by my music loving boys, is a decade old collaboration between Kanye West and one of my favorite artists Bon Iver (“Lost in the Woods”). I danced to it a lot this past year!